Looking on the bright side of life

Life as a stroke-survivor can be an emotional and physical roller-coaster. Physically, for instance, I can have two really active days, then find myself unable to raise the energy to move a day later as strokie-fatigue hits. Emotionally, the ups and downs are endless. I worry about money, my health and the future, but then I think "I'm here and alive and I nearly wasn't, so what have I got to moan about?

I try to keep this blog as positive as possible, thinking that you really don't come here to listen to me moan, but I was surprised to get a message on Facebook this week from a stroke-survivor who reads my blog and wanted to know 'how I manage to be so cheerful?'

I replied pointing out that Mrs W didn't buy me a Mr Men 'Mr Grumpy' T-shirt without good reason and noting that my natural grumpiness has got worse post-stroke.

But I also explained that I don't see the need to inflict that on my readers, that writing this blog helps me to focus on the positive and cheers me up and also that I aim to give my readers something to smile about, something which too many stroke-survivors understandably find difficult.

If I have to describe a tough week, I will, but I can't deny that this week has been largely very positive at Warrillow Towers. Last Thursday for example, I returned from my regular Thursday networking breakfast to find an e-mail from the newspaper where I did some shifts last month. Could I come in tomorrow afternoon and help out, they wondered? It took a nano-second to decide my answer. I went in on Friday and did my four hours, at the end of which they asked if I could come in again this Friday?

I don't expect this to be regular work, but I'll take whatever they can give me and if it gets me a foot in the door, it can only be good.

Talking of which, I applied a few weeks ago to be on the approved speakers' list for the West Midlands Federation of Women's Institutes. I see it as somewhere to begin my paid public speaking career (talking about stroke and other things) and again, as a possible foot in the door. And my Thursday got even better when they rang unexpectedly and said that for payment of a small fee, I could join their list. The cheque is in the post to them as I write. I am curious to know how this will work out. When I know, I'll mention it here.

Then on Tuesday, I began the next stage of my counselling-skills training at a local college. It will be tough, undoubtedly tougher than the ten-week introductory course I did earlier this year and I will have to learn to manage my workload and fatigue better. But it's a big step on the road to really discovering the new post-stroke me and it was great to see that a couple of wonderful people from my first class are on the course.

Confidentiality is obviously one of the tenets of good counselling, so I can't say too much but I'm sure I'll be able to keep readers of this blog informed of my progress.

Finally, the day of my sponsored run is getting near. If you haven't already heard, it's on Sunday September 27 at the Naturist Foundation in Orpington, Kent. Full details of the run and how to donate are at http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/MartinWarrillow and I'd be grateful if you'd take a look.

I've been sorting out details of trains and accommodation this week and obviously stepping up my work with Emily Smedley of breathebalancebeactivated.com. Yes, of course it hurts. As I sit here typing, plenty of me aches horribly. But it's got to be done, I ran faster yesterday than I ever have, before or after my stroke and I enjoyed it.

And I promise not to moan about how much I ache.